Are you concerned about the way you are behaving towards a partner, ex-partner, or towards a family member?  

Abuse in a relationship is when you try to control someone, hurt them or force them to do things they don’t want to. This can be done in many different ways and isn’t always obvious. 

Abusive behaviour can be: 

  • Physical or sexual abuse 
  • Violent or threatening behaviour 
  • Controlling or coercive behaviour 
  • Economic or financial abuse  
  • Psychological, emotional or other abuse  

It does not matter is this behaviour is a single event or a course of conduct 

  • Have you ever been violent to your partner? 
  • Do you ever use force in an argument – including using your physical presence to intimidate? 
  • Do you monitor your partner's activities and/or whereabouts? 
  • Do you control your partners and families finances and decision making? 
  • Do you have strong opinions about what your partner wears? 
  • Are you jealous? Do you constantly need to know where your partner is? 
  • Do you have strong opinions about who your partner socialises with? 
  • Are you making it difficult for your partner to meet or have a relationship with their friends or family? 
  • Do you call them names and put them down? 
  • Do you blame your partner for your problems or feelings? 
  • Have you ever threatened to hurt yourself if they say they want to leave the relationship? 
  • Do you phone and text them excessively? 
  • Do you monitor their calls and emails? 
  • Do you force them to do anything of a sexual nature they don’t want to? 

If you are worried you are using any of these behaviours in your current or past relationship then please call Relate on 024 7622 5863 or email to discuss. The Choose 2 Change programme can help you by encouraging positive and healthy relationships for you and your family.